Well, let's get started with some stories, these will be about people other than Randy...

• One time, OK, see, one time Randy Beaman's aunt was sitting on the ...
  ... on the front porch and she, and she was in her bare feet, and she felt a lick and she thought it was her dog ...
  ... licking her feet but it wasn't; it was this crazy guy that did that a lot.
  'K, bye.
• One time, OK, see, one time Randy Beaman's mom had a dream that she ate a big marshmallow and it was really good, and she, and when she woke up ...
  ... her pillow was gone 'cause she ate it.
  'K. Bye
• OK, so, one time Randy Beaman's cat ate this fish from the fish tank but the fish was a piranha, it lived inside the cat forever, and the cat became Piranha Cat.
  'K. Bye
• One time, OK, see, one time Randy Beaman's little brother ate Pop Rocks and drank a soda at the same time and his head exploded!
  'K. Bye
• OK, so, see, one time Randy Beaman's mom's best friend, whose name is Linda, wanted to get a tan more than anything, so she went to a tanning salon and she stayed in too long and she boiled her guts.
  'K. Bye
• One time, OK, see, one time Randy Beaman's family had this party with food and stuff ...
  ... and they had like this bean dip for the chips and everybody ate it and said it was really good, only it wasn't bean dip; it was a mistake; it was really dog food.
  'K. Bye
• OK, one time, Randy Beaman's sister, see, one time she was making a really ugly face ...
  ... and Randy Beaman's mom said, "Stop it; your face will get stuck like that," and it did.
  'K. Bye
• You know what? One time ...
  ... Randy Beaman's uncle Roy blew his nose so hard his brains came out. True!
  'K. Bye
• OK, so this is true. Randy Beaman's dad, Mr Beaman, who is smart, said to eat lots of carrots to get to see really good in the dark, and so Randy Beaman ate carrots all the time, and he turned orange.
  'K. Bye